There's a peculiar side effect of spiritual work that nobody warns you about in the meditation apps.
It's that more people will fall in love with you.
Not because you’ve cracked some tantric seduction code, but because something shifts in how you occupy space. And other people’s unconscious minds can smell it across a room.
The Psychology of Authentic Presence
When you start clearing out the psychological debris—living non-conflicted and in alignment—you’re presenting yourself completely authentically and non-defensively.
It’s like you become an unblemished pane of glass.
Something about being so “clear” automatically presents an undistorted reflection. You become a mirror—one that reflects back truth.
In other words, being truly yourself automatically shines a spotlight on everyone else’s unresolved material.
Something in people’s psyches detects this quality before their rational mind even knows what's happening. The unconscious whispers: “This person can help us.” The soul thinks: “This person can free us.”
And so their five senses lock onto the outer signs of your inner usefulness.
Suddenly, you've caught someone's attention, and their rational mind scrambles for a socially acceptable explanation for this magnetic pull.
It usually settles on one of two options: fascination or revulsion.
They either find you entrancing or deeply unsettling. Love you or hate you. And because these are just different faces of the same psychological coin, they can't look away regardless.
The Inevitable Psychological Drama
Here's where things get unpredictable.
When someone decides that they love you rather than hate you, they sink deeper into their appreciation of qualities they think belong to you.
All the while, they fail to realize that those facets of appreciation are either just parts of themselves gone unrecognized or cast members they’ve enlisted in their retelling of some unresolved psychodrama from their past.
And like any good drama, the tension must build.
Eventually, those sunny qualities they adored become unbearable to them. What once felt like salvation now feels like judgment. The very clarity that drew them in begins to illuminate shadows they'd rather keep hidden.
Cue shrieking.
Here, they may run away—self-sabotaging before you can get any further under their skin. Alternatively, conflict will erupt, and it won’t be productive because they’ll be falsely perceiving everything that’s happening through the lens of their past pain.
They’ve made you out to be a monster in their head when, in reality, you know you’re just being yourself.
The Three Predictable Responses
Depending on whether you’re familiar with what’s going on, sexy ol’ you will do one of three things…
Continue being yourself while the other person spirals into increasingly dramatic reactions, ultimately exploding and chasing you away;
Attempt a swift and painless exit, aware that this always happens and thus never allowing yourself to get too attached in the first place; or
Turn the other cheek and continue treating the person with kindness, understanding that their reaction has nothing to do with you and everything to do with their unfinished business with themselves.
This final approach creates an interesting fork in the road.
The Resolution or Resistance Fork
Sometimes your steady love cracks the other open, allowing integration to happen and freedom to come rushing in.
Alternatively, they’ll just resist you even harder.
The more they fight, the more they sabotage their unconscious mind's original mission when it sent them wandering into your orbit in the first place.
If you choose not to stick around while they thrash, there’s a chance the pain of your departure might crack them open later. Kind of like a time bomb you strapped to their heart, set to detonate whenever they're finally ready to face what you reflected back to them.
But if you’re a truly unshakable villain?
They’ll inevitably repeat the lesson some other way—with some other person or in some other situation. That’s the beauty and the curse of growth: Class is always in session until you pass.
In Conclusion…
Making others fall in love with you just by breathing is one of the underappreciated ways your inner work promises to make the world a better place. Because when you start vibrating high, that vibration echoes, causing others to shake when they spot you across the room.
So do your inner work. It’ll get you noticed. But more importantly, it’ll shake the collective awake.
That's not just sexy. That's revolutionary.
Thanks for tuning in. If the taboo and rarely talked-about corners of spiritual growth resonate with you, subscribe to The Aussie Mystic for more unfiltered takes on consciousness, chaos, and the messy magic of love.